Principles vs Values: What’s the difference? (with real examples)
Discover the real difference between principles and values, and how they guide your life
Ever felt lost but unable to put your finger on why — or even know where to start in figuring it out? Maybe you’ve wondered what truly drives your choices — your principles or your values? In this guide, you’ll discover the key differences between principles and values, how each shapes your daily life and long-term vision, and simple ways to combine them to create a more meaningful life.
I’ll break it down using real-life examples, psychotherapeutic insights, and practical tips so you can align with what matters most to you — and live with more purpose every single day.
What’s behind being “lost”?
If you’re feeling stuck, conflicted, or like you’re drifting through life on autopilot, you’re far from alone. Many people struggle to pinpoint why they feel disconnected — even when, on the surface, life looks ‘fine’.
Maybe you find yourself acting in ways that clash with your gut instincts. Or you feel torn between what others expect and what you want deep down. When your actions don’t line up with your principles or your values, you might feel guilt, frustration, or anxiety. Over time, this misalignment chips away at self-trust and leaves you wondering: Who am I, really?
This feeling of being lost is one of the most common themes in therapy. As human beings, we crave clarity about who we are and how we want to live. That’s why getting clear on your values and your principles is such a vital step in finding direction.
For more guidance on this feeling, check out this article - ‘Why Do I Feel Lost in Life? How to Live With Purpose’.
Values guide our thinking, principles guide our actions
Principles vs Values: What’s the difference?
Values and principles are two sides of the same coin — but they’re not identical.
Values are what you believe is important in life — your core motivators. Psychologists describe them as your ‘desired end states’ (Schwartz, 2012). They’re flexible, personal, and deeply linked to what gives you meaning — things like freedom, family, honesty, compassion, adventure, security.
Principles, on the other hand, are the unwavering rules or standards you use to act on those values. They’re your personal ‘code of conduct’. Think of them as the boundaries you set for your own behaviour — what you will and won’t do to stay true to your deeper beliefs.
Think of it like this. If your values are your compass pointing North, your principles are the path you choose to walk to get there — including how you overcome the many obstacles when the terrain gets rough.
Here’s an example of how values and principles work together:
Value: Kindness
Principle: Speak honestly but with compassion, even when the truth is hard.
Or,
Value: Growth
Principle: Seek discomfort. Try new things even when you might fail.
What happens when they clash
When you know your values but don’t follow principles that uphold them, you feel conflicted — you might hear psychologists or therapists refer to this as ‘cognitive dissonance’.
For example, you might value health but lack principles around setting boundaries with late-night work, so your wellbeing suffers. Or, you might value time with your friends, but lack the motivation to reach out to them regularly.
CBT shows us that unclear or conflicting beliefs can feed unhelpful thinking traps, like black-and-white thinking or people-pleasing, which heighten anxiety and low mood.
As Stephen Covey (author of ‘7 Habits of Highly Effective People’) said, “Living by our principles is what transforms our values from nice ideas into reality.”
How values and principles support a clearer vision
When you align your principles and values, you naturally create a sense of purpose. You start acting in line with what matters, making it easier to create a compelling vision for your future — see ‘The Psychology of Vision: Knowing Where You’re Going’ for a deeper dive.
Further reading: If you’d like to dig deeper, check out my guide ‘What Are Your Personal Values?’ for a simple path to discovering what matters most to you.
Principles and values are strengthened by positive choices every day
How to feel more in control with values and principles
Ready to get clear? Here’s how to explore your values and principles, and use them every day to live with purpose every day. These steps offer CBT-based reflection tools and practical examples you can use immediately.
Step 1: Name your core values
For an in-depth walkthrough, check out my guide to creating your own core values — there’s also a free downloadable PDF workbook with a list containing more than 75 values! Alternatively you can try running through a quick reflection of what values might be guiding you by asking yourself a few simple questions:
What do I admire in others?
When did I feel most proud of myself — what value was I honouring?
What do I feel guilty about when I go against it?
As you read back through your answers, try to spot the values that might appear. I’ve highlighted my own values in my example answers below.
So, for example, I might answer:
“I admire people who speak honestly, even when it’s awkward. I’m inspired by people who live simply but with big hearts — who treat everyone with kindness, no matter their status.”
“I felt most proud of myself when I was brave enough to face my fear of heights and walk the Camino del Rey. Another moment was when I started my own business, because it gave me an incredible sense of independence.”
“I feel guilty when I say ‘yes’ to things I don’t believe in, just to please people. I feel guilty when I break promises to myself — like resting or taking time for my family — because I value balance.”
Step 2: Define your supporting principles
For each value, ask: What standard helps me live this value, consistently and kindly? For example:
Value: Honesty
Supporting Principle: Tell the truth even when it’s uncomfortable.Value: Connection
Supporting principle: Listen without judgement and show empathy in conflict.Value: Balance
Supporting Principle: Say no when something threatens my health or rest.
It’s important to remember that these don’t need to be perfect — they’re living statements that can evolve and grow with you.
Step 3: Spot where you’re out of sync
Now that you’ve named some of your values and principles, take a moment to reflect on where there might be gaps between what you believe and what you actually do.
Look back over this past week. When did you feel awkward, frustrated, or just off — like you weren’t being true to yourself? Use these gentle questions to guide you:
Where am I living out of sync with my principles?
When do I compromise them, and what’s the cost?
What thoughts, fears, or habits come up when I try to stick to them?
This kind of reflection is a powerful way to catch unhelpful thinking traps — like mind reading, catastrophic thinking, or perfectionism — that often hold us back from living in alignment.
Top tip: In daily life, practise spotting the little moments when your principles are being tested. It could be as simple as choosing between junk food or a nourishing snack, or deciding how to respond when someone is rude to us.
Notice how each option feels in your body — the wrong choices often show up as a twist in your gut or a heavy feeling in your chest, because they go against your deeper values and principles. Learning to listen to these signals helps you build trust in yourself.
Step 4: Connect to your values and principles to a bigger vision
You now know what your core values might be, what principles can support them, and what challenges them. As you were working through those steps, you no doubt envisioned yourself in situations (real or imagined), seeing how you reacted and feeling how you felt.
Now, it’s time to reimagine that vision, as if you were living every day by your values and principles.
What does a typical day look like if I truly honour my core values and principles? How do I spend my time, who am I with, and how do I feel?
Think of a small, everyday situation — like responding to a stressful email or setting a boundary. How would I handle this if I was living fully by my principles?
When life gets tough — I feel anxious, pressured, or tempted to act against my values — what would my ‘principled self’ do or say?
How would people around me describe me if they saw me living by my principles every day?
What would I no longer tolerate, say ‘no’ to, or walk away from?
What do I gain — or risk losing — if I don’t honour my values and principles consistently?
Step 5: Putting it all together in a principles statement
Now you have all that valuable insight and self-awareness from your reflection steps, you can combine your discoveries into a short declaration that encapsulates your values and your principles.
For example:
“I live by honesty, compassion, and growth. I will speak my truth kindly, respect others’ boundaries, and embrace challenges even when they scare me.”
Top tip: Keep it short, keep it memorable, and stick it somewhere where you can rehearse it regularly — like in your journal, on your wall, or as a screensaver. This statement can help to encourage, motivate, and ground you — especially during tough times.
Final Thoughts
Understanding the difference between principles and values isn’t just semantics — it’s an invitation to step into a more grounded, meaningful life. Your values light the way, but your principles help you stay on the path, even when it’s hard.
Where in your life could you honour your principles more deeply? How might that change your sense of purpose, connection, or confidence?
Change doesn’t happen overnight — but every step you take in alignment builds self-trust. And with self-trust, anything is possible.
Ready to move forward in your life?
Want help getting clear on your values, principles, and vision? Download your free Vision & Values Guide to start defining what truly matters to you — and how to live it, every day.
About the Author
Hi I’m Alex Rogers, a student of counselling and psychotherapy with specialist training in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), and the founder of The Mind Hive.
Drawing on my background in mental health, content creation, and lived experience, my aim is to create accessible support that helps people manage anxiety, stress, low mood, OCD, and more—using evidence-based CBT tools and techniques.
Through The Mind Hive, I’m on a mission to make structured self-help more engaging, empowering, and effective—without needing to wait for 1:1 support.
Want to get started? Check out my 6-week self-guided CBT programmes.
